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271: Leah Brown joins Pastor Plek on the podcast this week for a special 2-part episode as Leah recounts her brother Andrew's unexpected departure from this world. Their discussion serves as a testament to the resilience of faith in the face of profound loss and sorrow, offering a raw and intimate glimpse into the spiritual battles and encounters that have shaped our lives.
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00:06 - Discovering God's Power Through Tragic Loss
07:40 - Exorcism, Mental Illness, and Struggling Faith
17:53 - Reconnecting With a Estranged Family Member
22:41 - Dealing With Family Conflict and Illness
31:18 - A Life-Altering Decision
Speaker 1:
And welcome back to Pastor Plech's podcast. I'm your host, pastor Plech, and joining me in studios now, other than Mrs Leah Brown, a longtime contributor to the show. Welcome, leah.
Speaker 2:
Thanks for having me. Yeah, hey, we're talking about some Happy New Year. Yeah, happy New Year. This is pretty great.
Speaker 1:
We've been talking about Leah and I have been talking about just kind of the past year 2023, and sort of the some of the tragedy that that was experienced, along with some triumph, but one in particular struggle that we point out was just the sudden passing of your brother, and we're going to just talk, get into that a little bit and of why, how that impacted you and how that impacted people who did lose someone in 2023. But, specifically for your case, how that we can learn a lot from what God's doing in and through your story.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, we had our first holiday season without my brother this year, so that was kind of. I know a lot of people can relate to what it's like to walk through the holidays after loss and it's not fun.
Speaker 1:
It's kind of hard. How does that is? That is like a feeling of doom, of dread, of.
Speaker 2:
Oh no, not for me, none of that, just just sadness, yeah, yeah. But so I'll start with giving a little bit of a family history back story here. And if you think, well, I'm talking oh goodness, why is she airing all this dirty laundry? I can assure you Restedies, it's already been aired, so you don't need to worry about any of that. But also and I don't see it as dirty laundry, I kind of see it as as a testimony, I feel like the passing of my brother, we were able to witness God's power in a really magnificent way and when you witness something like that, you just can't keep it to yourself. You have to talk about it because I don't know that I have like a lesson or a nice pretty bow to tie on the story, but I feel like it's a testimony worth sharing, because God showed me a lot of himself through the tragedy, and so, yes, I'm just going to talk about it.
Speaker 1:
Yes, let's talk about it. This is your older brother.
Speaker 2:
Right, so I'm one of six kids. I'm number two. Number one is Andrew and he's the brother who passed away. And then I have four younger siblings, three brothers and a sister, and so, yeah, we are age ranges like 10 years, and then I have my mom and my dad, and my mom and my dad raised us in the faith. They love the Lord. But before my mom came to know the Lord, she had a really tragic upbringing. She was adopted. Her parents rest in peace. Not really, they're not resting in peace. Only God knows.
Speaker 1:
Right, right, so most likely not in heaven.
Speaker 2:
I mean, as my mom's mom was on her deathbed taking her last breaths. My mom was there with her and she said they're coming for me, kelly, don't let them take me. Don't let them take me. I mean, and this is after an entire lifetime of my mom sharing the gospel with her and her rejecting it.
Speaker 1:
So you know, this does make me think of when we only did the afterlife.
Speaker 2:
Yeah.
Speaker 1:
Like and when that one dude still told the story of like the demons grabbing him and just like, wow that's freaky, okay, so she had an experience like that, as she's dying.
Speaker 2:
Right and was able to vocalize it, and so we. You know we don't have any reason to believe they're resting in peace. But you never know, god can do anything, and that's what this, this tale, is about.
Speaker 1:
That's why we tell people about Jesus right there. I don't want anyone to have that experience of. They're coming for me, help me, but it's hard.
Speaker 2:
I mean, my mom told them about Jesus every second she could. Yeah, from the moment that my mom was saved.
Speaker 1:
How old was she when she was saved?
Speaker 2:
I don't know the exact age, but it was young, 20s, maybe late teens. It was out. It was through meeting my father and my father's family, and they brought her to youth group, brought her to church, shared the gospel with her. She had a radical encounter with Jesus and that radical encounter with Jesus was then followed by a radical encounter with some demons. Yes, so she had been saved. Yep she. My younger brother, my older brother, andrew, had been born.
Speaker 1:
He was a little over one, and just when we're talking about demons not, I mean, I think of you as a pretty reformed person it doesn't dabble in charismatic.
Speaker 2:
I come from a very reformed background, right, so like this is sort of wild to hear from you, I think this is a good caveat.
Speaker 1:
Yeah. I'm glad you bring that up, because this is not like this, isn't Leah Brown? Ah, she's, you know, she goes to, you know, first assembly of God down the street. So this is like a normal thing that happens every week.
Speaker 2:
No, this is Leah God, who comes from a very reformed oh, leah God, wow. Leah Brown, oh, oh.
Speaker 1:
Freudian slip oh gosh. So there's clearly a complex we're working through. Go ahead.
Speaker 2:
So we're working through a very reformed family, which is kind of funny, and I think that that speaks to a little bit of a tension and a struggle that I'm gonna get into later. We don't talk about these things, despite the fact that my mother, after a one year after birthing my older brother, andrew while I was in her womb, she was brought to an exorcist after having a lot of struggle, but there were all of these things, these torments, these voices, these compulsions, it's like this in. I mean, I won't get into too many details just for this time.
Speaker 1:
This is where details matter. This is it's helpful.
Speaker 2:
I mean hurting herself.
Speaker 1:
Okay.
Speaker 2:
Just no, no control over herself.
Speaker 1:
This. So the question that comes up for me on this what is? Do you think she was saved at that point? Or maybe I don't? Know, or who knows?
Speaker 2:
I do.
Speaker 1:
I was just saying, but still experiencing like a demonic oppression of some sort.
Speaker 2:
That had probably been there her entire life. She had been exposed to demonic power forces Her entire childhood I mean she, before meeting my dad, was a practicing witch, so she did.
Speaker 1:
Okay, hold on, hold on. Before your mom married your dad, she was a practicing witch, like in a coven. I mean sorry, I mean, what else is there I?
Speaker 2:
think you would find that most practicing witches aren't actually in covens. But the scary thing.
Speaker 1:
Well, what do you do Like? What do you call your community of witches?
Speaker 2:
It's not. That is what you call a community of witches, yes, but I think something that I've come to terms with through learning a lot of this family history and hearing these stories told and then witnessing my brother's tragic passing and everything that led up to that, is that their spiritual forces are super real and you can access spiritual power through darkness and through light. And although the counter, like the dark, spiritual power is counterfeit, but it's like those, the dark arts guys in Exodus, right when Moses throws down his staff, janus and Chambres, or whatever. They have names. Are they named in?
Speaker 1:
Exodus. No, they're named in a second Timothy.
Speaker 2:
Oh, okay, okay, yeah. So it's like they were able to throw down their staffs and make snakes too, like there was something really crazy happening through dark spiritual power.
Speaker 1:
Now I don't wanna be overly nuanced, but was there a difference between black magic and white magic? I mean, I would say it's all dark, but was she like oh, but we just did the white magic?
Speaker 2:
I think that I don't know the answer to that.
Speaker 1:
Okay, yeah, that's fine.
Speaker 2:
But I think that dark magic is being disguised as good magic. You have shows like the Good Witch. We like to dramatize it and make it like there's even little kids shows. There's a little kid show that I love and I won't. It's called Bluey, and there's one episode called Magic and I don't even want like I kind of got icky letting my kids watch it because they were like the one rule of magic, because you only use magic for good and that can. That's just convincing you that you know magic can be used for good, and I think that that's a life in the pit of hell, because when you start tapping into those powers, it's you get to be.
Speaker 1:
God is what magic is.
Speaker 2:
Yeah.
Speaker 1:
I can control the forces to do what I want them to do.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, so there's a very real spiritual realm, as obviously you know, and the Bible is very clear about it. It's all over the Old and New Testament. But for me growing up we didn't really talk about that stuff. But I'll bring you back to my mom. I'm in her womb, my brother's one year old and for whatever reason she is taken to see an exorcist, my dad goes with her and I mean that was not an easy decision.
Speaker 1:
Like, I know this scene, but where do you? Find, do they look the yellow pages? Exorcist, I mean like how did?
Speaker 2:
they know. I don't know the answer to that, which is like how do you?
Speaker 1:
find these people. Oh, go ahead.
Speaker 2:
Through. Maybe a pastor, okay, but clearly not this one. Yeah, right. I mean, I actually I wouldn't know where to go. Anyway, go ahead, you would. Yeah, I would.
Speaker 1:
Anyway, as the story goes, so if you have an issue, just come to me. I'll put you right. Go ahead.
Speaker 2:
There were she was exorcised many demons on that night and that involved thrashing animal sounds. She tried to like kill my dad who was in the room, and so, but as my dad tells the story, like he faced those demons, like they spoke to him through her and he remembers the thing that he talks about is they told him lies and accusations. They knew all of his dark secrets of his entire life up to that point, which he was young, he was like 21 or 22. Maybe even like 20. And they knew all of these secrets of his that he had never shared and they were speaking them out, him making Accusations, trying to terrify him that you have no place in this room. Who do you think you are? You have no authority over us.
Speaker 1:
And blah, blah, blah and and he like plead the blood of Jesus. What did he do?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, lots of pleading the blood of Jesus, lots of scripture, lots of like laying on of hands like the exorcist Newer to do, but that I mean that's kind of in the weeds, I mean I guess.
Speaker 1:
no, I mean that's the stuff that we're like, that's what you're here for. The show is about hold on. But, leah, like, when did your dad tell you all this?
Speaker 2:
You know. So this was kind of that's an interesting question. I don't know if you know the answer that question or you know you don't. I had never been told this story outright by my mom or my dad. Now some of my siblings apparently had been told the story but I had never asked. But I had always sort of known which is a really weird like I had always known this pseudo fantastical tale of my mom and some demons, but I didn't know any details and I didn't know a narrative. I just kind of had a feeling.
Speaker 1:
Did you want to know or like?
Speaker 2:
I didn't want to know because I also didn't believe it. So, and that kind of goes into. Like my young childhood, my mom was Was very mentally ill. Even even after that she continued to be mentally ill and she continued to get worse. As I was a child, or the symptoms of that. Well, we'll call it a schizophrenic cocktail. Okay so the little schizophrenia mixed in with some other mental illness. Okay and that that's a big part of my story and a difficult upbringing from my perspective. Just because you know all the mommy wound things like you want, you want these things out of your mom. That she's you think, everyone else has this but you don't. And that's something that I worked through and healed through and well, I mean, you're never done but whatever. So something that I came to terms with. That this is an aside note, but I really struggled in college, my college years when I was really growing closer to God. I struggled with this anger because I had prayed my whole life for God to heal my mom and he wouldn't do it and I was so frustrated by that. Side note, again, I watch. I was watching the chosen last night and I got to this part, which season in which season three oh yeah, where he's talking to little James, it's. I think it's season three, episode two maybe. Oh, it's so good and little James is got like a lit, he's limp and and he's like how am I supposed to go out and heal people with the power and authority You've given me, if, if, and I'm not healed, and Jesus like do you want me to heal you? I could heal you right now, he's like, but I also could not heal you and think about the testimony in the story that you have If you, you still believe in me while you're still suffering. And I was like I was a Fountain listening to that because it that was a lot of the Realizations that I had kind of come to and healing with those.
Speaker 1:
Like I said, mommy wins my big fan of the chosen.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I am too. I don't know that either. I don't think that part was taken out of scripture, but it's a really nice. Yeah the disciples. So anyway, yes, my mom was mentally ill growing up and I think that because of that, my brother I wasn't the only one who had a lot of wounds from that. My brother had probably 10x my my wounds from that, even being older and witnessing and experiencing more.
Speaker 1:
How much older?
Speaker 2:
About two years yeah, just two years. And so, while I, like I mentioned, had a lot of anger at God, I also had a faith which was not of my own, it was, it was a gift from him. A faith that was unwavering, even in my struggles and my anger and my turmoil, and that Faith that blossomed into like a really flourishing relationship with him and a call in my life to follow and pursue him. Much Thanks to you know, god, working through you in college. But my brother didn't have that. He Struggled, I mean, and he was always a little bit turmoil. He was kind of like he go to college. He did. He went to st John's University. It's a really prestigious school. It's not quite Ivy League, but it is in the east.
Speaker 1:
It's close to all the Ivy League. Yeah, right there, brown and all those things, yeah yeah, yeah, I mean my brother.
Speaker 2:
He's incredibly intellectual. He's Everybody who meets him thinks he's the smartest person they've ever met. He's also really philosophical and and while he also was raised in the same Bible believing Family that I was, I don't know that he ever Latched on to it the same way. He always had questions and he always searched and he would find answers to those questions, but he would keep searching and it was really never enough for him. Neat that said, he would still say that he was a professing, bible believing Christian, and that's part of the conversation that I had with him before he died, of which we'll get to. But so he goes off to college. Like I said, a lot of turmoil from childhood Unworked through and he was pretty focused on it. He marries my high school one of my high school best friends, oh yes, and they're. They've been dating all through high school. They were sweethearts, they get married, they moved to Phoenix together, they're teaching at this school a little prep school for kids and and they're happily married for a while and then, all of a sudden, they're not happily married and then all of a sudden we find out that they're getting a divorce and that was kind of like a secret. They didn't show up to Christmas one year and and it was like, oh, what's going on? So they get a divorce and Nobody really knows what happened, except for I'm talking to her because I remained close with her. But what we did know was that when they moved to Phoenix, they both really started walking away from their faith at some point. We didn't know details, but they both started walking away from their faith. They both started seeing Eastern therapists, so like Union Eastern healing shaman's, like all the things they started getting. It in Arizona is actually pretty big hot spot for that's new age stuff Crystals, rocks, all the good, all the good stuff. Yoga, I'm just kidding.
Speaker 1:
But I mean that, I mean it is, I mean like the mountains in itself is the place you go to meditate in the master.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, yeah, um, anyway, won't get into that too much, but but yeah, so we know that they've divorced.
Speaker 1:
They've both been into this, but they didn't really tell you that there wasn't like hey family, I'm leaving my wife or it's not working out. You just found out. I mean, how'd you find out?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I don't remember exactly how we found out but it was actually after that? Yes, they did. It was after the fact and it was after like he clearly had pulled away from a family like he. I think he felt a lot of shame and he just wasn't connecting with us. He wasn't coming shame for not being a Christian, shame for the divorce all of it, all of it, and we didn't know the circumstances of the divorce, and so there were a lot of assumptions made. Now, granted, like I said, I made a point to talk to Megan because we were very close for so many years I mean very close and so I kept up with her and then I did learn the circumstances. I mean, it wasn't her fault, like we all thought it was him. He had kind of drifted away I mean, it takes two to tango but it always does but he had kind of drifted away in his love for her and latched on to like another girl at school and he didn't want to cheat on her. So he got a divorce, told her he'd never really loved her and that she was just a surrogate, for, you know, healing some childhood trauma. Maybe that's too much, that might be too much dirty laundry, but whatever.
Speaker 1:
But that's hard. I mean, I think that's hard. Any marriage that you sort of feel like you were used for something is just unbelievably painful. But probably everybody goes into every marriage with trying to get some sort of fulfillment to fill whatever is lacking and that's only meant to be filled up by God.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, that's a really good point, but that's around the time when he started and that's around like eight, eight years ago. He starts really drifting away and losing touch with the family and feeling isolated and, like I said, the shame, I think, of all of those things was the driving factor there and we were all just kind of really sad, like really sad, that Andrew the funny witty wins every single board game every single time, isn't showing up to family holidays, he's not joining the family online games, like all the things. He's just kind of isolating himself and that was sad. And then so at some point, at some point, I made a point and actually it might've been more him who was reaching out to me and we started having these like weekly phone calls and this is in the last couple of years.
Speaker 1:
How long were the phone calls?
Speaker 2:
Hour, two hours, I mean as long as I could. My husband would take the kids to gymnastics on Thursdays and I would just make dinner and chat on the phone with him for as long as possible and every time and I was so grateful for that, and actually that's starting when COVID hit. That's when COVID hit and everything kind of shut down. My family. We started getting together online me and the siblings and Andrew started joining and we started playing Jackbox games. And the phone calls kind of spawned out of that and it was really good and I was just really excited. But I'll say, every time I talked to him on the phone, at the beginning of the conversation he would sound really just distraught and then by the end of the conversation he's laughing and he's back to his normal Andrew self and it's good and that's part of why I kept it up, Because I knew, like I said, there was a lot of emotional interterm oil. He spoke therapy constantly and he was always telling me about his therapy, which I have also been to therapy, so I was able to kind of like meet him there a little bit and talk about some of the things. I think I felt like he and I had a connection that was deeper because we had a lot of the same memories and the same experiences as children. Like a lot of my mom's deeper like struggles happened when maybe he and I were the only ones conscious enough to have those memories, Not that it didn't affect everyone, but it really struck us and so we were able to kind of talk through that and I was I always would make a point like trying to show him the gospel through our past and his past.
Speaker 1:
It was Like how Jesus was actually there in the midst of all that, as opposed to like completely vacuous.
Speaker 2:
Yes and how. Jesus is the solution and the healing agent for all of that when not young, not personality tests, not all of the things which of course you know, whatever we could get into that. But I tried to meet him on equal footing with things like the Enneagram, which is kind of rooted from young, and like we would talk that and then I would try to bring him like deeper and share the gospel anyway. So it was intentional but it was also awesome. Okay, that's the background and so we're having one of these phone calls in June last year, just a normal Thursday phone call, no big deal, and then he on that phone call he tells me that he has some bad news for me and I was like what, okay? And he says, well, my wife. So he had gotten remarried to the girl that he worked with, whom I knew and I had met in the past a couple of times. My meetings with her were always very interesting.
Speaker 1:
I bet.
Speaker 2:
He said she's asked me to leave. She was kicking him out and I was like, oh man, Andrew yikes, and he was really upset about it and I, on the tip of my tongue it was on the tip of my tongue. I was this close to telling him well, just come, stay at my house, Like I've got a big house, I've got extra room, I've got plenty of food, I could give you anything you want, just come to my house. But I didn't. I didn't say that and I didn't feel like it was fear, holding me back, by no means like I wanted to make that offer, but there was something in me telling me just don't yet, don't do it. And so I kind of held onto that and I listened and I asked questions and I told him I was praying for him and that I loved him and that anything he needed I was here for him, you know. But that was an intentional remark, not just to show off, like a lot of people would say.
Speaker 1:
Not everybody is like that, but a lot of people.
Speaker 2:
Anything you need.
Speaker 1:
Anything you need, just don't call me. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2:
So we have this conversation in June, and as soon as I'm off the phone with him, I call my dad and I'm like Dad, what's going on with Andrew? And he was like, oh yeah, he told you about that. I know he's been wanting to share with you and that was really hard for your dad to kind of keep that to himself. No, my dad is a very stoic man, easy to keep it to himself. My mother, on the other hand, no, there's a lot of credit for not sharing. Now, I'm not sure how long they had known. I think I was one, I think I had been one of the last people to know. But so it goes. The people you love the most, it's the hardest to tell them the hard things. That's at least that's what I tell myself. That's good, I like that when I'm out of the loop. They just love me too much to tell you yeah it's just too hard, because they love me so much, okay. So so my dad says, okay, yes, yes, we know, and I'm like dad. Well, what are we gonna do? We got to do something, we got to help him, yeah. And my dad says Don't you dare offer for him to come to your house. Oh, interesting and I was like what he's like he is not going near my grandchildren and I was like what? Yeah and then he says I'm not letting him bring his demons in there. And I, once again, what? Yeah, no to that. I said oh so you don't want his demons around my children, but you'll let them be around your children because, mind you, you still have two little ones living in the house, and by little ones I mean 24 and 26.
Speaker 1:
No judgment.
Speaker 2:
Sometimes you got four boys. You got to make sure you get them out of the house. Yeah, absolutely much love to them, much love but the best thing for you.
Speaker 1:
Live on your own.
Speaker 2:
Well, not always, cuz you know, andrew did flew the coup and we see what happened to him. But so my dad says he's not bringing those demons near my grandchildren. And I'm like you're absolutely ridiculous, like this is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. We are. I am not gonna let my brother be without a home, which he was not financially. He didn't really have a means of taking care of himself and he's never been good at taking care of himself, and I think that's part of why his new wife wanted him to leave, because he was not contributing. I don't, I am not gonna speculate, but I know what we do know is that Andrew is Super easy to love and everybody loves Andrew, but he's very difficult to care for. That's kind of been one of the themes of his life, anyway. So back to the conversation with my dad and I said, dad, you're ridiculous. There's no way, like, the best way to reach people is to show up for them in their time of need. I'm gonna take him in, I'm gonna be superwoman, whatever these demons, that's nonsense. I'm sick and tired of this nonsense. I don't like remind you I have not heard this, this tale right this point and I'm just kind of like it's all hoopla. It's like some stupid family hoopla fantasy that we don't actually which I feel bad for saying that, but that's kind of how I felt In the time. So that's just a confession that we don't really talk about, but apparently it happened. But we're also all stoics and we don't believe in that stuff, so it's just like a really weird place to be. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1:
Yes.
Speaker 2:
And. And so my dad was like, leah, I'm telling you, do not bring him in. And I was like, well, tell me about this demon stuff anyway. And that's when my mom and dad both got on the phone and they finally shared Like this whole tale that I had never heard.
Speaker 1:
Does your mom remember it or is she like no she?
Speaker 2:
remembers it. Yeah, she has lots of details. Yeah, maybe you should be interviewing her and I'm gonna get on here. There'd be too many tears Anyway. And so they tell me this tale and I still am super skeptical, I still think it's a little bit ridiculous. I'm like that was 30 years ago, like come on, like whatever. And I said, dad, I'm gonna invite him to my house. I, I hear you on that, but he's my brother and if he's gonna like kind of get now, mind you, like I said, he'd walked away from his faith. He was struggling in so many ways and all of us in the family had been praying for him to come back to the Lord, like I mean, that was at the tip of the forefront of our minds constantly and my prayer had actually kind of shifted to and I think everyone else would testify that the same thing. Our prayer had kind of shifted to bring him to rock bottom, so that he will come back to Christ, and that was definitely what we'd been praying. And so my dad says I tell my dad like this is rock bottom, we're gonna help him. And my dad was like he can come to my house. And I was like, oh, okay. And I was like okay. He said, leah, if my house weren't an option, I wouldn't fight you on this, but my house is an option and I'm equipped to handle to fight this battle. He's like I don't want you to fight this battle with your kids in the house. And I was like still thought it was ridiculous. Okay, so anyway, I talked to Andrew again a week later. I don't make the offer At this point. He tells me he doesn't feel so good, he's moving, he's packing up his stuff, he's trying to look for a place, he's got a couple options which my dad is trying to convince him to move to my dad's house. But he says he doesn't feel so good. And I'm like, yeah, I know, andrew, that's kind of par for the course with you. And he's like, yeah, I know. And I was like have you gone to a doctor? No, I don't really feel like it. And I was like Andrew, will you just go, please Just go to a doctor, get checked out. And he was like, well, I might actually do that. My eyes look a little yellow. And I was like Andrew, go to the ER, cause I had had a friend go through something where that was like the first symptom, and I was just kind of thinking all of that. And he listened he went to the ER.
Speaker 1:
I let it go.
Speaker 2:
And then it was like a day later I get a phone call from him giving me an update. He tells me that his liver's in really bad condition but he's septic, he's got a septic infection and they've given him this regimen that two out of three people do really well on and it's probably not a big deal. And if all this fails, like a transplant is an option. So and I'm still kind of like, yeah, okay, you're sick, god is allowing this like you're sick, he's gonna heal you, he's gonna which I'm not saying that to him. I'm thinking this I'm like. this is rock bottom. This is great. This is what we've been praying for. Yeah, and my mom calls me and she's just in tears. I'm at a friend's game night celebrating a birthday.
Speaker 1:
Oh, I remember that I was there and then, you like, left.
Speaker 2:
And I walked out of the game.
Speaker 1:
This is where you are. So you I think my brother's dying and we're like you need to go, and you're like, okay, let's keep playing, and I'm like well, but that speaks to.
Speaker 2:
I'm glad you can testify to that, chris, because that speaks to the skepticism that I still had in my mind.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, and when we came back in he's just asked my brother says he's dying and I'm like shouldn't you, like I don't know not be here or something I don't know. It was a strange moment.
Speaker 2:
I didn't, I didn't fully, I didn't believe it.
Speaker 1:
Okay, and nobody had said that was the first phone call you got and it's kind of weird.
Speaker 2:
I think you're probably still processing it and I thought it was drama, honestly.
Speaker 1:
And your brother was prone to some drama and so yes, other people too.
Speaker 2:
So I kind of thought we were being dramatic here, you know, but nonetheless, on the phone with my parents, I gave them this pep talk, this excellent speech which, too bad, it's not recorded. And I was just like you guys, this is what we've been praying for. We've been begging God to bring him to rock bottom, to bring him back to himself, and that's what this is. So our job is to step into this and to be agents for the gospel and to love him. Well, and what is that? And I was very inspirational and I believed all of it.
Speaker 1:
I mean, I'm inspired now. This is great. I didn't believe.
Speaker 2:
I didn't believe he was actually gonna die. I didn't think that. I thought, like I said, maybe miraculous healing That'd be cool. But I also, like I said, skepticism is the theme here. I didn't really believe he was gonna die and I definitely didn't believe this demon nonsense. I thought it was all kind of ridiculous. And then it's a couple days later. It's just like oh, like he's getting worse, he's not recovering. And then finally, on the 4th of July, that was kind of the day where I got the phone call. Actually, I think I made a phone call when they used the word hospice and that was when it hit me, like that was the moment. I was like what Hospice? Like no, no, no, no. I got in believe it, but I did. I was like he's dying, he's gonna die, and wow, this is a lot of background. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1:
So you fly out there.
Speaker 2:
Yeah. So I felt like you know, when we were at that 4th of July party and you and Adrian were both really great, you were like you should go out there, you should go out there. And I was kind of like, oh, that's a lot of work. But then the more I thought about it, I was like I should go out there. And then there was a moment in my mind that was really definitive. It was just this moment where God was saying I'm gonna do something really cool and you get to come be a part of it. Now, don't fly out here Like you think you're gonna change anything, Like that's not, but I'm gonna do something really cool and if you wanna be a part of it, I have a plan. And I was like, okay. So I bought a ticket at like two o'clock in the afternoon. This is the next day. I wait for Kyle to get home from work. He gets home at four, he brings me to the airport. My flight's at seven and if that flight hadn't been delayed 30 minutes, I would not have gotten on that plane because of the time. It was super busy anyway. So thank God for that, Like literally thank God for that Flight delayed. I get out to Phoenix. Even then I just had no idea what I was walking into. You know, like I had planned, I had tried to convince Adrienne well, she wanted to come with, but the flights were very expensive, Like, just kind of like, okay, we'll go get a hotel and we'll relax and hang out and I'll see my brother and still, just didn't know how dire the situation was. Just that's. I don't know what's wrong with me. Like there's just the skepticism every step of the way.
